27 Dresses

Trailer

Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Sounds familiar? Yup, I present to you (dramatic music playing) – 27 Dresses – another modern day fairy tale story of a Cinderella en route to her happily-ever-after, well, after she gets through the handful of weddings that she’s bridesmaid-ing. A lot of fairy tales here lately huh?

So Jane (yes our average Jane) is destined to be a bridesmaid just as Van Gogh is with art (and bipolar) and Mozart with music. On this particular Saturday night, Jane has to go to two weddings simultaneously, her 26th and 27th time being a bridesmaid respectively. She prepares everything for the bride, from the cake picking to dress fitting, from the invitation sending to dress holding while the bride pees on the toilet. Everything and anything you could think of on a wedding, Jane takes care of it for you. Aside from being the exceptional wedding planner, she chaotically hopped from one wedding to the other then back to the first. She was so busy running back and forth, making sure everything is alright and everybody is happy, she had no time to change her bridesmaid gown except in the taxi. That is how she caught the eye of the cynical prince-charming-to-be Kevin. (Ah the princes have a tendency to be cynical, don’t they?) He ends up taking her home and picking up the organizer she left on the taxi. Flipping through the organizer, Kevin decides to write an article on (bridesmaids like) Jane for the new issue of the NY Journal.

Jane works for an entrepreneur, George, who is also the man of her dreams. Unfortunately, when Jane’s baby sister, Tess, comes to town to visit, spark ignited immediately between Tess and George, pushing Jane out of the picture. The next thing you know, poor Jane is busying herself planning the wedding for her dear, sweet, but selfish, and irresponsible baby sister and George. Did I mention George proposed to Tess in front of Jane?

Well, the real story starts with the columnist Kevin. So after he finds Jane’s organizer, he sends her flowers the next morning without leaving a card. She completely mistook it as being sent from George and was pleasantly surprised. Then Kevin shows up and dumps cold water on her sizzling fantasy by telling her that it was He who sent the flowers. Jane’s reaction? She runs off to the corner, opens the door and yells out her frustrations. Awkwardly for Jane, what’s on the other side is a couple’s 50th anniversary celebration. What a nice addition to the anniversary. To add to the fun/frustration (your pick), Kevin tore a week off Jane’s organizer and filled his name on every Saturday for the remainder of the year before he returns it to its proper owner.

In return, Jane avoids Kevin. However, when Jane finds out Tess is going to marry wearing their mother’s wedding dress, yes the one dream wedding gown for both sisters, she finally calls Kevin. Sadly, Jane has no one to talk to other than Kevin. After all, how can she be selfish and complain when it’s her sister’s happily-ever-after? So Kevin assumes the responsibility of “training” Jane to say no to people. They bond a little but once he’s gone, she reverts to that good old yes girl.

But chance brought those two back together. Kevin is the famous columnist whom Jane absolutely adores — she doesn’t know who he is because he hides behind a pen name. When he shows up for an interview with the soon-to-be-married love birds, Jane feels cheated and becomes angry at him. He pays Jane a visit under the pretense of getting an interview but accidentally discovers Jane’s collection of bridesmaid dresses.

Kevin asks Jane why she keeps those dresses and if Any of them actually looked decent. She digs through them and picks out an olive colored gown and tries it on to disprove Kevin’s critique of it being vomit colored and ugly. Soon enough this “I’ll prove you wrong!” spiteful inclination turns into a “hey let me try on the dresses for you and I’ll tell you the wedding theme and how fun it was!” My personal favorite was the lavender kimono and the fact that once Jane stands up after the photo shoot was over, she’s two heads taller than the bride and the other bridesmaids.

The next few days, Jane resumes her duty as the mastermind organizer and tries out the wedding food with the groom. Kevin comes to look for Jane and witnesses her happy conversation with George and turns a little green. The two decide to go shopping for Tess after the food try out, Kevin insists to come along. At the end of the day after dropping George off, Kevin and Jane enters a heated conversation in the car, mainly ignited by Kevin’s jealousy at Jane’s affection towards George. The bickering ended with the car spinning out of the road and sinking into a puddle of mud. They are stranded, in the rain and nooooo reception. They enter the nearest bar to find a pay phone, unfortunately it’s broken so the two end up settling for a drink at the bar. A drink turns into two, soon they both get a little drunk and as the music comes on, Kevin and Jane start to sing and dance. Not long a crowd of people gather around them and it’s a fiasco! At the end of the night, Kevin and Jane join in a tight embrace following by a “hot hated sex” in the car.

Next morning, the two join at breakfast in a local restaurant, still stranded but waiting for the towing car. A man approaches Jane, recognizing her as the girl who danced last night. Then the waitress comes along and recognizes Jane too. This time she’s recognized as the perpetual bridesmaid. The news break out, the article that Kevin wrote is on the front page of the commitment section, 24 inches big, decorated with the 27 pictures of Jane in her bridesmaid dresses. Jane is embarrassed and infuriated. She storms out, refuses to pick up any of Kevin’s apologetic phone calls. To make matters worse, when Tess finds out that the new edition of the journal is not about (her and) her wedding, and that the spotlight has transferred to her wallflower sister Jane, she throws a tantrum at Jane and walks out on a stunned Jane.

Life goes on. Jane goes to her sister’s dress fitting one day and discovers that her mother’s wedding gown which she treasures wholeheartedly is being trailered into pieces by Tess. Saddened by the sight of the reminder of the dress and furious at Tess’s lack of appreciation for anything, she calls her sister a “bitch” before storming out. On the night of the pre-wedding party where a picture slide show and words of appraisal of the couple is being presented, Jane goes up, looking gorgeous, reads exactly what Tess wrote out for her to say and shows the picture slide show that is about the ruin Tess’s marriage. Apparently George’s notion of Tess has been nothing but a big fat lie. The slide show juxtaposes pictures of Tess and George as the perfect couple while mocking their drastic differences and Tess’s lie. After all, a picture is worth a thousand words. By the end of the picture slide show, the atmosphere has turned from merriment to awkward silences. To top it off, Pedro, the kid George’s taking care of through charity work reveals that Tess has been making him do all the cleaning in the house in a light hearted “if yo’ll want some decent cleaning done, sign up at the lobby”.

Now Jane has done it. She has managed to reveal Tess’s true nature in front of George; ruined her baby sister’s marriage; made a fool of herself and her sister, and worse yet, George; let out her suppressed anger; and feel terrible about herself. She returns home, cleans out the 27 dresses from her closet, quits her job, and goes to find Kevin.

Jane finds Kevin at a wedding site. The bride recognizes Jane from Kevin’s article and helps Jane to locate Kevin in the crowd. A confession takes place, Kevin and Jane end up making out under the bless of the crowd and the newly weds.

A year later, the scene opens again at a wedding, Jane’s wedding. Tess and George reunite, this time Tess has learned to be honest about herself. Jane and Kevin officially enter what Kevin previously calls the “only legal slavery” – Marriage. The ending credits show the next day’s NY Journal where Jane makes it on the headline of the commitment section. The biggest selling point of her story aside from the perpetual bridesmaid has finally become a bride, is the fact that her bridesmaids out number the guests. As Jane has been there for them, the brides whose wedding Jane planned and attended over the years all dressed in the corresponding bridesmaid’s gown, standing in a row behind the bride as the couple take their vow.

La fin.

5 thoughts on “27 Dresses”

  1. you forgot the part where George calls her after she cleans her closet, because he’s still dateless for the benefit. And when she confesses her love for him, he kisses her but she tells him she doesn’t feel anything, and neither does he… AND THEN she finds Kevin.

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